More than Messy

More Than Messy

A safe place to learn about hoarding

Cleaning

Cleaning a hoard is different than “regular” cleaning. Special precautions may need to be taken with regard to the hoarder’s reaction to someone cleaning, pests and rodents that may accompany the mess sometimes, and other people and animals that may need assistance due to health or mental health issues. Please understand you may need to seek help from a professional, whether it be a therapist or a professional cleaner, before you try to clean a hoarded home. This website does not offer medical advice or serve as a substitute for medical advice.

Keeping Your Space Clean in a Hoarded Home

This can be tricky and will depend on your situation.

  • You may have to try cleaning your space secretly. If you can put firm boundaries into place, this is important. For instance, “This space is mine and it will be kept clean.”
  • Lock your space if you are safely able to. Some hoarders won’t allow locks on doors.
  • Prevent additional accumulation if you can. You may have to disguise or hide your cleaning. Empty boxes can serve to give the impression that the space is already filled, but they’re easily moved or dismantled when you’re in your space.
  • Throw out or move any trash or food away from your space. You may have to wait until you’re alone in the home to do this if it will be a problem.
  • If your laundry machines don’t work, take a load of clothes to the laundromat.
  • Use or borrow a vacuum cleaner.
  • Keep clothes and other items in plastic bins with lids to keep insects and rodents out.

Gently, the only real solution is to find your own healthy space to live outside the hoarded home. Building independence can help you move toward that. Building a vision board can also help you visualize what you are working toward.

Keeping Your Space Clean Outside the Hoard

People who grew up or are currently living in a hoard may never have been taught to clean. This page is intended to be a resource for how to keep your space clean. Your space may be in a hoarded home, or it may be your own home if you’ve moved away from the hoard. The content below is not all-encompassing; rather, it offers basic how-to cleaning tips gathered from existing sites. The American Cleaning Institute offers a good general basic cleaning guide, so you know what’s important to focus on.

The most important thing is that you be gentle with yourself. Living in a hoard is hard, and breaking that cycle can be hard too. Cleaning can be a challenge for people who grew up in a hoard. There are all sorts of emotional triggers around cleaning. Don’t put too much pressure on yourself to make things perfect. It does not have to be “all or nothing. If all you did in a day was to wash the dishes in the sink, that’s a success. The good news is that you get to define your “new normal.”

My rule of thumb is that I like my house to be in a state that if friends dropped by, I wouldn’t curl up and die. Have I mopped in two months? I have not.
Will anyone know if they come in? They will not. Do not judge yourself against any other houses, whether in real life or on social media.
Figure out your personal rule of thumb and try to keep to that standard.

You may find or create a checklist or schedule that works for you; there are some examples below. There are a bunch of phone apps as well that might be useful. Try to remember these are guidelines. Not mandates.

Today’s Homeowner offers a Comprehensive Cleanup Guide for People with Hoarding Disorder. While the title implies this is just for hoarders, there is quite a bit of useful information here.

Decluttering

Decluttering is important, because the more “stuff” builds up around you in your living space, the more your brain can also become cluttered. Clutter can be triggering; and keeping it under control can be good for your mental health. If your space becomes too cluttered, then cleaning can become overwhelming, and the messy cycle starts.

It may help you to try and shift your thinking. Clutter on the counter means you can’t wipe it down. Clutter on the floor means you can’t vacuum. Clutter on furniture means you can’t sit, lie, or place food on it. Clutter on stairs means you might injure yourself or someone else. If you can start to see clutter as the roadblock it can become, it may help your motivation to keep it under control.

Get rid of the guilt. Try to detach from the emotion of “stuff.” I held on to every birthday card everyone ever gave me. Why? Did I look at them? No. I finally threw them out (I let myself keep the ones from my husband and kids) and it felt great. I held on to gifts for years that I didn’t like or want. Why? The people who gave them to me didn’t ask.* If you thank someone for something, that’s all you owe them.

*The asterisk is a special exception for the hoarder in your life, who will absolutely ask about the gift they gave you and give you grief if you dispose of it. These gifts require a little extra finesse if you get rid of them.

Tip for Overwhelm: If anxiety takes over, pick things up and put them away while you slowly count to 100. When you get to 100, you’re done for the day.

American Cleaning Institute: Decluttering

Bathroom and Kitchen

Bathrooms and kitchens are particularly important to keep clean, as those are the places germs and bacteria grow the fastest. Try these tricks:

  • Try to keep your countertops clutter-free so you can wipe them down every day or two.
  • If you don’t have the energy to wash the dishes, at least rinse them and leave them to soak overnight in soapy water.
  • Put a package of antibacterial wipes under every sink for easy access.
  • Wash bath towels at least once every couple of weeks.
  • Throw your dish scrubbing brush or sponge in the top rack of the dishwasher once a month or so.
  • Microwave a wet sponge for 60 seconds to loosen up any dried food and wipe down.
  • Keep a scrub brush in your shower and scrub problem areas while you’re in there with just water.
  • Keep your old toothbrush when switching to a new one and move it to the kitchen for scrubbing things.

Be sure to check out the Health and Safety page for more on food safety.

Tip for Overwhelm: Use a podcast or playlist as a timer. Work until the end of it, and then you’re done.

Living Spaces

Keeping your living spaces tidy will give you peace of mind. No one ever told me you should (or could) wash pillows. I didn’t know that sheets and towels need to be washed in hot water to kill bacteria and dust mites. Here are a couple of ideas:

  • Two or three sets of sheets allow one to be in the laundry while a clean set gets put on the bed.
  • Invest in a mattress protector to reduce allergens.
  • Dust bunnies never killed anyone.
  • Before washing sheets, use one of the pillowcases to clean the blades of your ceiling fan, catching dust inside. Just be sure to shake it out outside so all that dust doesn’t go into your washer.
  • Sweep before vacuuming.
  • Don’t neglect filters. Change out air filters every 30 days. While you’re at it, check on the filters in your dishwasher, washing machine, stove fan, refrigerator air/water, vacuum. Dryer lint filter should be cleaned after every single load.

Tip for Overwhelm: “Just” do it. Just make the bed. Just put the thing away. Just load the dishwasher. Once it’s done, there will be less to still do!

Tips and Tricks

The biggest tip is to change the wiring of your brain. Don’t say you need to “clean the kitchen.” Break down that big project into bite-sized tasks. Instead, put away anything that doesn’t live on the counters, change the filter in the refrigerator, and sweep the floor. Tomorrow, you can clean the stovetop and microwave, mop, and wipe the countertops.

There are a million websites out there with tips and tricks. Please feel free to do your own research. The ones below will get you started.

Please see Disclaimers page.